Day 354 - Ectopic heartbeats

Dear Simba,

I find myself in a state of fear and worry. At a routine midwife appointment, the midwife noticed something unusual with your sister’s heartbeat.

She reassured me, saying there was a 99% chance everything was fine and that it might just have been a faulty machine—but I was still sent to A&E for further checks.

I went not only because of what she said but also because your sister was moving a lot, which felt unusual to me.

At the hospital, they performed a CTG scan. The readings were within the normal range, which was reassuring, but during a follow-up scan, the doctors detected ectopic heartbeats. Ectopic heartbeats. I’d never heard of these before, and the term itself sounds so frightening.

The doctors explained that these are relatively common and often resolve on their own, but they need to monitor me daily to ensure everything remains okay.

Your daddy has been doing most of the research because I feel too scared to delve into it myself. He keeps reminding me that the doctors said these irregular beats are usually harmless, but that hasn’t eased my anxiety. Since this afternoon, my blood pressure has risen, and I feel on edge. I know this isn’t good for your baby sister, and your daddy tells me to relax—but how do I simply turn off this constant loop of fear?

I’m terrified, Simba. I’m scared of losing her. I worry about things like heart failure, or the possibility that I might never get to meet her. The thought is almost unbearable. I’m trying to be brave, but I can’t help but feel consumed by these fears.

Love,

Mummy